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The Cosmopolitan Balcony Warning Stickers

By Chuckmonster on Tuesday, 13th May 2014 9:51am
  » filed under Las Vegas  comments: 9

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I love warning stickers. From albums to irons, there is nothing better than a gluishly affixed potential hazard notice... at least until those damn kids (us) with razor blades start re-arranging the letters into something obtuse and/or obscene.

VT reader Roland shows us via Twitterstagram that The Cosmopopotopolous of Las Vegas has affixed some newfangled notice to their terrace doors. (Apparently, they've been there forevah.)

We see your strangely poetic warning sticker, Cosmopolitan, and raise you an anagrammed villanelle, punkily truncated.

Respectable fee plus
A tough toss, Fender
En woe, exit a scrunchie...
Chatterer genius. It is
a really mingled telex
wrongdoers a'hurt too.
Dropsy!! Off bacon jet!!!
Crater thee. You are
a sorry nonslip beef
ghetto injury, a drama
outgo you surrey
sauce.

Makes as much sense as their current crop of commercials do. "But I thought 'Right Amount of Wrong' meant we can throw all these art books off the 64th floor!" Should you take a shot a this with the exacto, please send us a pic.

Update: Some folks report seeing these stickers up to a year ago. Others have never seen them.

Oh, and the valet park at the High Roller might be the greatest thing ever, and Slotzilla is open and Binion's hotel is still closed. Tips, folks, we got em!



Tagged: cosmopolitan   



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Comments & Discussion:

I've seen these roughly my last 3 to 4 stays here, so up to a year and a half ago. Also worth noting there are bolts on the balcony doors to keep them security locked at chest height, presumably to keep smaller kids from opening and wandering out onto an unattended balcony.

People throwing stuff off their balconies is why they still have the netting up over the pool at Jockey Club.

I'm surprised no one has tried peeing off the balconies yet.

No way in hell you could convince me there hasn't been peeing off those balconies.

Poor Jockey Club, the owners of the largest outdoor urinal in Vegas. Not that all pools don't have pee in them, but this just seems worse somehow.

Stayed there twice with the last trip about 2 years ago, one wraparond (awesome) and one typical room. Never saw those signs.

But with the typical room balcony the cushions had been detached from the furniture, one lying just on its own on the balcony floor and I was wondering if those cushions didn't go flying...especially with strong winds.

... IT IS ILLEGAL AND EXTREMELY DANGEROUS TO THROW OR DROP EACH FEE-TRYST OBJECT ON FAR. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE ...

When does the Jockey Club sell and avoid people tossing things over the balconies and people walking the Strip who don't even know they are there?

@levans...here's an really good, if a little old, article on the Jockey Club that answers your question:
http://www.lasvegassun.com/news/2011/aug/12/jockeying-position/

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